Cheap is a tough word.. A tough description you could give to yourself...
Worthless is another bad description of oneself...
How can I say how I feel about myself?
He was so harsh, but he had every right to be...

"You're a grown up. How can someone your age do what you do? You are not a teenager anymore... Not a university student... You are a responsible adult... You are a pious lady in the marriage age..."

And I couldnt utter a word after he was done with his speech of teaching me how to behave like an adult respectable woman... I appologised and left to my bed... Giving my back to the world and to myself... I only wanted to hide... I felt so cheap, so childish, so ridiculous and so unworthy of respect... I felt like I didnt have a childhood... I didnt live as a teenager and I am living it now... At the age of 25...

He was so right about me... I couldnt help but burry myself in bed... Wanted so bad to hide from my own self but couldnt stop thinking of the fact that I am a child... I am cheap... I am an old woman... I am nothing...